Just breathe

Phew.

What a week. Or rather, the beginning of a week.

I don't know about any of you, but sometimes it seems like a week (7 days) goes on for so long. Or certain days seem longer than others. Well, this is one of those weeks for me.

In moments throughout my day I felt like things were going quickly and time was flying. Other moments seemed to drag on forever and felt so tiring. Anyone else ever feel like this?

I ended up finding myself tonight really needing Jesus. Like, when it came time for my Bible time - which I have been doing in the evenings - my heart and soul were hungry. I was ready to enter the time when it is just completely Him, myself and His Word. And man, God is so faithful you guys. He knew I needed Him. He knows we all need Him. And He is faithful and committed.

1 O Lord, you have searched me and known me! 2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. 3 You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. 4 Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether. 5 You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it.

7 Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? 8 If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! 9 If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, 10 even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me. 11 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night,” 12 even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you.

13 For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. 14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.

17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 If I would count them, they are more than the sand. I awake, and I am still with you.

19 Oh that you would slay the wicked, O God! O men of blood, depart from me! 20 They speak against you with malicious intent; your enemies take your name in vain. 21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O Lord? And do I not loathe those who rise up against you? 22 I hate them with complete hatred; I count them my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! 24 And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!

Psalm 139 ESV

These words of David stay with me. His praise is so on point! God knows us. He knows when we need encouragement, when our spirits need fed, when we need to feel love. And of everyone, He is definitely the most capable of providing for our needs. That is just such an important thing for me to remember. I tend to reach out to Brendan or family or friends before reaching out to God. And that isn't the order I should have that in. And so it is something I have been working hard on.

This life isn't meant to be easy. It is hard. There are times when we feel sadness and hurt. And that is okay. Because we have hope. As Christians, we have hope. Jesus is committed to us. So let us continue to commit and remain focused on Him.